Gift-Exchange as Consumer Behavior

“I Will Love You if You Love Me.”

Gift exchange—perhaps no other custom among humans is so pregnant simultaneously with economic as well as social meaning. In every culture and nation, people of virtually all ages and economic means expend considerable time, money, and thought in buying gift items. For several weeks preceding Christmas day, for example, in most of the Western world, consumers are on a mission and adventure, combing stores of all stripes, trying to find suitable gifts for as many as 20 to 30 persons. For some, it is a period of economic hardship, scraping together enough money to buy a gift for everyone on their list. And this economic burden is joined in by considerable social risk as each gift must fit the recipient’s expectations, and still be within the buyer’s budget. One wrong move, and it could jeopardize the relationship with the intended gift recipient. Therefore, let us understand the consumer psychology of gift exchange.

Anthropologist and consumer researcher John Sherry defines gift as a tangible or intangible product voluntarily given by one person to another, through some ritual presentation and embodying some symbolic representation of the giver’s sentiments for the recipient.

Cultural Meaning of Gift Exchange

The very idea of gift-exchange (regardless of the specific gift occasion or the gift item) is embedded in culture. Every society imposes certain obligations about gift-giving. In fact, we all have three obligations: an obligation to give; an obligation to receive; and an obligation to reciprocate. All gifts have some symbolic meaning. Basically, a gift-giver expresses empathy–saying in effect that “I share in your life, in your joy, in your celebration; I am happy because you are happy.” Not giving a gift when expected communicates that the expected giver does not wish to maintain a relationship with the assumed recipient. Conversely, the recipient has the obligation to receive. Not accepting a gift would imply that the targeted recipient does not accept either the relationship itself or the specific sentiment the gift conveys. Third, reciprocation is a core norm between gift-exchange partners. Reciprocation means returning the favor in like manner. Once accepted, the recipient is expected to reciprocate at some future time. Non-reciprocation will convey a desire to not maintain the relationship.

There is one exception to the norm of reciprocity. Generally speaking, reciprocity is expected among status equals (i.e., people of equal status) but not from status subordinates (e.g., personal assistants, valets, servants, mailpersons, etc.); to these recipients, the gift generally conveys appreciation for the services rendered. Occasionally, status superiors may also not reciprocate (or not reciprocate with the same personal touch), signifying that the gift is viewed as a token of gratitude from the gift-giver for their patronage or tutelage.

Every gift serves three functions:

Social Integration The gift integrates the giver into the social group. By giving the gift, the giver in effect says to the recipients: I want to integrate myself in your group, in your society. I want to be seen as part of it.
Social Distance Reduction By giving a gift, the gift-giver gets closer to the recipient. It is a means of building a relationship with the desired person or increasing the distance (by not giving the gift) from those who are less desired. We fashion our gifts accordingly, being generous or incorporating a personal touch for the former group or people, and barely meeting the obligatory expectation in the latter case. When properly used, gifts serve as social lubrication.
Tangible Expressions of Relationships Not only do gifts build relationships (i.e., reduce social distance), but they also specify the nature of relationship. Gifts between family members are different than between coworkers; which in turn are different from gifts between lovers.

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Because gifts have cultural meaning, the selection of a gift is a serious consumer task, filled with great social risks. The social risk stems from the following potential errors:

Status Incongruent The gift item may be perceived as inappropriate to the status of the giver and/or the receiver;
Disproportionate The gift might violate the norm of reciprocity--unequal to the gift previously received by the present giver; and
Impersonal The gift might be considered less personal or more personal than desired. When relationships are in the formative stage, the risk is one of over-reaching rather than under-reaching; the exchange parties must start with relatively impersonal gifts and progress in small steps to more personal gifts—constantly reading with each exchange episode the recipient’s acknowledgement and acceptance of the giver’s sentiments.

Such is the fascinating world of gift exchange and the all too important role gifts play in our lives.

(Risks and Gratifications of Gift-Giving)

Excerpted from

MyCBBook—the World’s Second Most Interesting Book on Consumer Behavior

(www.mycbbook.com) HOME